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PHP Funnies

Smoking PHP makes me laugh!

I was hooked the first time i took a drag of PHP. All my complicated C shit became clear after one puff of PHP. It was so addictive i couldn't stop. I had to prowl the PHP CVS, meet drug dealers like Sterling and Andrei, and even hang out with the Grand Loco himself, the Zeev.

I've gotta warn them java addicts. If dey tot that James "Goose" Gosling was tuff, they ain't met the Zeev, he dont even blink when e bumps off feature requests he dont like, n he wrings the necks of pushers who dont keep dat PHP shit pure n proper for the script kiddies he sell to.

An PHP is much worse than Java. PHP allows you to kod without any classy chicks with da big objects up there. PHP don't care what type you are, white, black, integer or itty-bitty bit. And PHP is bad, so bad - even if u dont init yar vars - yar code will still run and u can still git high. And no one can catch the pushers; they just disappear, cos PHP is run-time, you know. It suck you in, suck you in, just u wait. Dont say i never warned u java folks. Dont say nothin. I warned u. Just u wait.

Here's my small collection of PHP funnies:

- I am Spartacus: Sterling Hughes pokes fun at Zeev and Andi's claim that they entirely designed PHP3.

- Evolutionary PHP5 lies.

- Interview with John Coggeshall by php|architect and PHPCon.

- PHP Look Back 2002, by Derick Rethans. Derick also did one for 2003.

- Have you read the PHP manual? by B.A.T. Svensson (rude).

- 10 Reasons to like PHP by manit.

- Student Suspended Over Suspected Use of PHP, by Brian Biggs.

PHP developers love mod_perl (rude).

Non-PHP Stuff

- How to Write Unmaintainable Code

- Resign Patterns

- A typical IT project in pictures.

- Hilarious Programming Quotes.

- Decompiling Programmer-Speak.

PS: Suggestions for funny articles to link to are welcome!